Wednesday, February 8, 2012

Experience and Adaptation



Okay, experience teaches that there's a "right" way and a "wrong" way to mount a toilet paper roll on the spool.  The right way is, of course, configured such that the paper lies over the top, not behind the roll.  It just is.  I've seen the pros and cons in ridiculous detail, but over the top is "correct."  70% of those polled (on some apocryphal internet site I read) agree and if I've learned nothing else in my 42 years, it is that if 70% of the people polled think it's so. . . who am I to argue with those geniuses?


It bothers me that my wife seems to hang the toilet paper indiscriminately, like it somehow doesn't matter; like it's somehow not the huge deal that it so totally is.  When I do happen to spy the roll incorrectly mounted, I change it without comment, however, because when I do bitch about it, she says things like, "If you'd have bothered to put the new roll on yourself when you finished the old roll I wouldn't have had to put the new roll on incorrectly!" which just distracts from the point, (which is that she's doing it wrong) and redirects it to something irrelevant (that at least someone is doing it).


Despite knowing the "right" way to mount the rolls, Lily receives an 'adapted' roll.  It's not in her IEP or anything, but like other adaptations and therapies we've implemented for Lily, it allows us to give her some amount of privacy while she sits on the potty while simultaneously preventing this:



From turning into. . .

This:  


Because you can't do that if you roll it from underneath.  

Experience is the best teacher.

47 comments:

  1. OMG!! This was too funny! Who drew those? Was that YOU? Where did this genius come from? And yes, you are right. The toilet roll should be hung with the paper over - with your obvious exception. (Tootles must never see this post!) ;)

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    1. It was me. I want one o' them there fancy drawin' tablets like Jillsmo has. Gussying them up with a mouse is too big a pain in the ass.

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    2. The drawing tablets are overrated. I sooooo prefer the mouse ;-)

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    3. you're just saying that to make me feel better, aren't you?

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  2. There has got to be some merit to that. I always (ALWAYS) load the TP from behind and I have a skewed perception of reality. Or maybe my reality is just screwed. I don't know.

    Has she stuffed it down the vent yet? Mine did. That was fun.

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    1. There are so many unmastered layers of gross motor skill required to accomplish that that I'm not concerned.

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  3. Hahahaha! Too funny! And your wife is right. If you put the new roll on yourself she wouldn't have to do it wrong.

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  4. Love it! We still have baby baffles on the bathroom doors to keep Little Miss from TP'ing the house.

    Fantastic drawings!

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  5. am just relieved to know that I am not theonly person who concerns myself with the riughts and wrongs of this situation. Although I do live my life alternating between pictures 1 and 3.

    p.s. my fancy ipad is acting all disrespectful and such and freezing and not letting me go back to fix typos...I see them...right up there. My hiusband said to take it to the geniuses...just once I would like him to be the genius! (oh and he is picture 2 which paints him in a more positive light than i might have imagined!)

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    1. I appreciate you giving me a heads up on the typos. . .

      i have a fancy ipad. . . no issues. But i'm a genius. in my own mind.

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  6. LOVE the drawings. I'm thinking the toilet paper manufacturers just need to put a little "This End Up" sticker on them and solve this entire existential dillemna.
    Another point you failed to mention- keeping a back up roll within arms reach. I learned this the hard way when my son used the SHOWER CURTAIN to wipe while potty training.
    ~Kris (Letmepeeinpeace)
    PS: Your wife is right. And she's smart, too. ;)

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    1. oh my. Well, Lily doesn't actually USE toilet paper. . . that's what parents are for, apparently. But yeah, good call.

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  7. where is the part about the fancy folding into a triangle at the and and embossed logo in all this talk? that too is important. the little things we never think about . and as you have been told your wife is right!!

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  8. Look at you...hiding a bunch of impressive talent! Your pictures are awesome! But I think you're putting the toilet paper roll on all wrong.

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  9. You must stop with this drawing immediately. You are making the rest of us look bad, and I can't abide looking bad.

    However, I do congratulate you on addressing such an important issue with clarity and common sense.

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    1. You're not the boss of me.

      Also thank you. And also also. . . how's your eye?

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  10. Thank you for expounding on this topic. Good job!

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  11. You should do what I do. I just leave a roll on the back of the toilet. My wife gets mad when I don't change the roll on the dispenser. So I just stay away from it.

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    1. I get in trouble if I do that. I try to stay out of trouble where possible.

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  12. personally, I'm an over kind of person. However, I see your logic. Pure genius.

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  13. Ha ha ha ha ha...it's funny 'cuz it's true. Tate does the same thing with TP...and one of these days I'll remember which way makes it less easy for him to shred an entire roll onto the floor...until then, I'll refer back to this post. :)

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    1. Lily still will get into the roll, and often I'll just remove it and put it out of reach, but the damage is less (a few shredded pieces on the floor around her) when i spool it under.

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  14. My Lily just removes the roll and drops the entire thing in the toilet. No unrolling needed. Thus the reason why she gets absolutely no privacy.

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    1. Mine doesn't know how to remove the roll yet. And she can't put it in the potty because I'm always there. She doesn't initiate those trips yet.

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  15. I like mine the correct way, over the top, with the ends folded into a balanced triangle (not a lopsided one!). And yes, I'm anal.

    Cool drawings!

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    1. I agree. . . all things considered that's how I'd do it (probably sans triangle though).

      Thanks!

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  16. Your wife is clearly not equipped for bathroom paper product management. It goes over the top, or people die. PEOPLE DIE. What does she not get about that???

    Oh, and nice drawings. Do you ever whore yourself out to other people with no artistic skills?

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    1. She confronted me about this post TOO! I was on the treadmill and she was all, "I do TOO know how to put the toilet paper roll on! I do it that way all the time!"

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    2. oh. . . and also thanks! and sure!

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  17. Very funny, and now besides a great writer and are a great illustrator - missing your calling Jim!!

    Ms Aweeze

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  18. Snort. You're ridiculous.

    P.S. my toddler yells at me when I put the roll on wrong so I MAKE HIM DO IT

    I'm no fool.

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  19. Of course the paper lies over top! Perhaps your wife is simply testing your commitment to right-ness. Stay strong.
    My mother in law does it all wrong. She hasn't seen the polls; and whenever we visit I sneak in and fix things for her. It's the least I can do as a loving daughter in law.

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    1. I hope she appreciates all you do for her...

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  20. She's like a cat! Love it! GREAT pictures! I totally agree that the toilet paper needs to roll over the top.

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    1. yeah, and I have to keep up with the nail trimming for that very reason. She scratches like a cat too!

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  21. YES! Same thing is going on here. My girl can TP the bathroom in seconds flat!

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    1. My wife is "teaching" her not to do it. This apparently involves telling her "no" a lot, while she plays "Jumbline" on her iPhone outside the bathroom. I watched the whole process last night before Lily went to bed. It was very instructive. At one point my wife had a whole sotto voce conversation with Lily about "proving to your father that this will work" but Lily was a reluctant conspirator.

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